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Driving bliss Best roads? Best music? Whatever makes your 8 the best place to be, share it with us

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Old 8th November 2016, 08:57 AM
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aTOMic aTOMic is offline
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Default My Tale of Heartbreak-Turned-to-Bliss; Possibly the Longest Post on the Forum

Sage Green Metallic. Although I'd never seen an '8 in this color, and as we all know Audi's crazy color nuances are difficult if not impossible to photograph in a truly realistic manner, I was pretty sure I wanted this color, which was only offered in 2004. I've a friend whose job is a "car broker"; he flies out to auctions and checks cars for potential buyers (e.g., from Ebay or commercial auction sites). He told me I'd NEVER find a good one, let alone with an interior any color but Beige (which doesn't go well with the paint IMO).

Well, my 175K miles beige car was in the shop for a vacuum leak I cannot find, and SOMEHOW they "Bricked" it! (first time I have taken ANY car to a shop except for bodywork). The car would not allow any connection whatsoever to any modules. Totally dead in spite of the 100%, 13v, load-tested battery. Shop's diagnosis was "AT LEAST Immobilizer Replacement & Steering Column Necessary - $6000 or so". As only the $tealer could do it, (Immo, y'know. gots to get the codes), and it'd have to be flat-bedded there (an hour away)! I had sadly resigned myself and convinced the missus it wasn't feasible to invest $6k in a $5k car no matter how much we loved it, I started the hunt in earnest for another D3 (mind you, I had had an "Autotrader Alert" set up to send me loads of new A8Ls for sale from all over the internet via email every day for three years or more) - only one sage green one, in California, which had several body repairs on its carfax, and they wanted about twice what it was worth. Granted it only had 15K miles on it, but the whole thing felt wrong. The vanity plates said "LUV 2 KNIT" or something like that, and I think it was owned by a person who quite possibly died in it while waiting for her garage door to open. It appeared to be set on lift - plus two inches. I'm guessing the concept is akin to those lift-assist electric recliners for people who can no longer get out of their easy-chairs. It probably smelled like "Charlie" and cat urine.

Lo and behold this (Sage) A8L popped up for sale 45 minutes away. Perfect inside and out, 90K miles, "SOUL" (black) interior! Smelled like new, price was right, owner was a complete tool from Czechoslovakia, he claimed (I think he was a porno actor/producer; he claimed to be a forklift operator but had a $10,000 watch, meticulous grooming, tattoos and shoes with white soles that were actually white - a fancy lad). Reminded me of the Russian villain in the Rocky movie, except not "pumped up". We met at the shop where my car was for a(n agreed-upon) pre-purchase inspection (PPI) and my buddy the mechanic actually stopped work on a car instantly, put it off the lift, put the sage car up and started checking everything. Well, you'd have thought he was poking holes in the underside with an ice pick from the look on Vladimir's face. He had a FIT! I told him Don't you know what a PPI is and how long it would've taken at the dealer? I couldn't understand half of what he said and that just made him madder. He insisted the car be taken down; Jerry ignored him and got the underside done quicker than a Soviet Tantrum!
I was thinking he was hiding something and told him I couldn't deal with the drama - he was in a big hurry ( I knew he was gonna meet his connection ) - and to just fock off. Which he did, with great vigor.

He texted me, "apologizing" in an asinine way about a week later, wanted to let me know someone was coming from Louisville (3 hours away) and since he and I were such good friends he wanted me to have first shot. I laughed (emoji) and told him good luck. If he hadn't lived 45 minutes away (right near the shop where my car was, BTW) I'd have probably killed a few hours kicking the tires and otherwise taunting him, to see the veins on his pasty white forehead engorge and pulsate. If I'd been lucky, he's have stroked out and I'd be on my way in my new car. But I digress.

My 97-year old dad had just gotten out of the hospital and given 2 weeks to live (he is still alive now - almost a year later), needing 24 hour attention. My mom, who is a full foot shorter than him, was overwhelmed, mentally and physically. I'm an ex EMT and was actually in nursing school at that time; and i'm pretty big, so I had to concentrate on my invalid dad.

Our car had died (did I mention I had just spent a year rebuilding the entire front end on it?), my dad was dying, my dream car was right there locked away by some spiky-haired junkie imbecile who was doing everything one should NOT do when selling a car. I was mad at the world.

Coincidentally, the seller texted one last time when I was on my way to the shop to try to salvage (resurrect) my car. I agreed to meet him the next day at a public place. (his choice). Didn't get the beige car going that first day but got lots of possible causes eliminated.

Next day (good American content here) I strapped on my shoulder holster over my "The Big Leibowski" ("The Dude Abides") t-shirt and popped some hollow points into the ol' stainless 1911-style hand cannon. Threw an unbuttoned Hawaiian shirt over that, went and got the cash, and met Dick (his name actually was Richard, haha). He seemed pretty sedated (my professional opinion) and so the deal went smoothly. In fact he was like a different person.

We call it my unicorn. As in you'll never see one (here). I called Audi's special A8/R8 Concierge and a lovely woman named "Gabby" (Gabrielle) patiently entertained my trivial questions. She emailed back the next day and reported Audi imported exactly 121 Sage Green cars, and of those 121, only five had the black interior! The rest were beige.

Oh and I took my trusty tools and VCDS to the indy specialist's shop and fixed the beige car, because I am truly brilliant under pressure. The guy had the car three months and had more than eight hours diagnostic time in it, but was only going to charge me for two, as he's a friend who is an Audi GENIUS! It bugged him to no end that I fixed it (it did take me most of two days and over a six-pack a day in the 98F heat). Did I mention my theory that the South was settled by, uh, people of limited intelligence? "Hay, y'all; less settle down RAHT HEEYRE where the humidity is 100%, the skeeters, ticks and chiggers are a-runnin' over, and the dirt is red clay that won't grow shee-it!!"

But...
Every now and then, in the midst of life's misery, Someone throws you a bone.
Thank you for listening. Now I'm too tired to dig up good pics... but you get the idea...
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I'm in love with a car.
2004 4.2L Petrol A8L
Sage Green/Black (one of only five D3s thus colored sold in the US)

Last edited by aTOMic; 8th November 2016 at 11:25 AM. Reason: remove duplicate pics & fix 4AM grammar
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Old 8th November 2016, 10:04 AM
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Delboy Delboy is offline
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Nice one Tom its nice when you get a little thing like that in life that you think will never happen.

I remember following the story of your other car on Audiworld, proper nightmare.
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Old 8th November 2016, 10:20 AM
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David's8 David's8 is offline
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Nice buy and I guess if you want something bad enough you'll get it in the end. Good effort
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Old 8th November 2016, 11:39 AM
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aTOMic aTOMic is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Delboy View Post
Nice one Tom its nice when you get a little thing like that in life that you think will never happen.

I remember following the story of your other car on Audiworld, proper nightmare.
My fault, really, for I admit I wasn't thinking clearly. I didn't follow proper troubleshooting steps because my life was fragmented and my memory is insufficient; plus I had enough other cars to drive that it wasn't an urgent task to fix that one (until the plates expired) .
BTW, Wasn't it nice of the State of Tennessee to make the plates to exactly match my car(s)?! (still have the "Eleganze Green" Passat).
Thanks, Del.

Quote:
Originally Posted by David's8 View Post
Nice buy and I guess if you want something bad enough you'll get it in the end. Good effort
Exactly what the Audi dealer wanted to do.

Thanks, but most of this story is luck, kismet, karma, whatever. For as much whining as I do, my life is pretty wonderful. We all have impediments and inevitable sadness, part of the journey. The worst part was the nursing school almost drove me insane! Personality conflicts, ethics disagreements, and jealously.
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2004 4.2L Petrol A8L
Sage Green/Black (one of only five D3s thus colored sold in the US)
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